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The writing blog of James Christopher Sheppard. I am a 26 year old gay male from London, UK. Here I present my experiences, poems, thoughts and opinions...

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Saturday 11 December 2010

Depression Confession

Sometimes the wave of melancholy is irrepressible. Lethargy of the mind sets about preventing any useful logical thought and rusts the foundations I spent so long re-enforcing. Your voice is shrill and is burning my taught drum like spitting boiling oil. What will it take to make you realise that I don’t care? Make you understand that you are pushing me further towards the inferno? My forced smile is hollow. I do this for an easy life; so you will leave me alone. You don’t pay attention though, you don’t shut up. When will it be clear to you that I want to be alone? Want, need, crave- you’re making my lungs shrink. Yes I am hopeless in these moments of bleak clarity, because I cannot escape. You have the effect of electric drills being hammered into my skull; the dirty cold metal gritting through bone. It sets my teeth on edge. 

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